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Cole = stupid twat who didn't drown or freeze to death, much to our readers disappointment.

Cole dresses. Cole thinks back to the Circle meeting. Again.

He and his father yell at each other about the fact that the dad beats him, while his father says that he gives Cole swats and that he's devoted his life to Cole. They scream at each other and then are separated. The Keeper gives Cole the feather.

"Cole tried to be calm, but his voice shook and his face felt hot. "We aren't supposed to lie when we hold the feather, but my dad just lied. My parents don't have the time of day for me. I'm just in their way, especially since they split up. I bet my dad can't even tell you when my birthday is."

What we're getting here is Cole's sob story. My parents beat me and don't love me. But the problem is, I don't feel any sympathy towards him because he's already acting like a jerk. He already beat up a guy and doesn't feel any remorse to it. And he refuses to take responsibility for his actions. Also we never see his emotional response to this abuse except for anger. He's always angry. We have no other emotional response from him. He's a one trick pony and I'm bored of him. I don't care about him. We're fifty pages into the story. It's far to late to make us care about the protagonist. Or even sympathize with him or anything. Our first impressions have already been formed right in the first few pages and it's going to take some major character development -which there has been none of - to make us change our minds about Cole.

This is a very important point. In Sir Apropos of Nothing the main character is an equally horrible person, but the story is told in such away that within the first few pages we sympathize with him. We learn his emotions, that he has a range of them. He's amusing and interesting enough that the reader wants to keep on reading, even after they learn about his horrible life and what he does. In Cole's case, we learn that Cole hates everyone and is angry all the time. That's it. When we do get droobles of Cole's past, we learn nothing emotionally new about him, in anyway that we can relate, except that he's a complete and total idiot. Our indifference, turns to annoyance which turns to out right loathing and a desire to throw the book across the room. Which we can't because it'll startle the cat and wake up the roommate. Ah, the problems of doing these things at one in the morning.

Garvey gets the feather next and talks about how some juvenile delinquents become functioning members of society and others don't and innit funny? He then says the funniest thing that I've read so far in the book, "Cole has will and courage". Scuse me while I go laugh my head off in the corner there.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA........ ...!!!!

Right. I'm better now.

He continues about how Cole is deeply wounded and needs help and how would anyone react in his circumstances. He gets people thinking. Then Peter's lawyer says that Cole is a menace to society. Peter's mother says that it's Cole's fault that her son is all messed up and they should send him to jail.

Cole then gets mentally bitchy because the talk of Jail is old and they might as well have just sent him there if they keep on coming back to it. I don't really care.

Peter then makes a remark that warms my heart though, "I think someone should smash Cole's head against the sidewalk so he knows how it feels." I'm sure most readers feel this way too.

They then have a prayer and the meeting ends. Cole refuses to take his parents' hands. Cole and Garvey talk after the meeting. They discover that Cole's father doesn't know when Cole's birthday is. And Garvey tells Cole that Cole's father wasn't the only one who was lying.

We go back to Cole on the island. Cole gets something to drink and decides that he's going to have to wait another day to try swimming away from the island. But this time he was going to do it well rested, warm and fed. Where he's going to get the food, having burned up all the supplies, I don't know.

Cole then watches the tide come in. Cole imagines what peoples reactions will be when they find him missing. He yells at his dad then remembers one time he disobeyed his dad -he came home late- and his father beat him with his belt. And then beats him with the metal part of his belt. And Cole screams. And screams more and then Cole's mother says 'Honey, you're hurting him' Cole's father threatens here but stops beating Cole.

And then we're back to the damn circle meetings. Number five. Cole is trying to plead with people asking why they don't believe him. And Peter's lawyer is all "STFU U R LYIN BASTARD" So, Cole is like "FUCKYOU WHY DON'T YOU JUST EXILE ME THEN?!" And the circle meeting goes "HAY! GUD IDEA!"

So they decide to see about exiling him and then setting judgment after a year.

Touching Spirit Bear
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