If you thought last chapter was bad, this one is even worse. It's a completely talking head chapter. Brom gives his "I wish I could have told you this when I was alive" speech to Eragon.

It starts off with Eragon going to stare over a cliff. Saphira comes over and asks him how he's feeling. In an effort to be deep we get this conversation.

She swung her head toward him. And how do you feel, Eragon?

You know as well as I do.

A few minutes ago, I did, but not now. You have grown still, and looking into your mind is like peering into a lake so deep, I cannot see the bottom. What is in you, little one? Is it rage? Is it happiness? Or have you no emotions to give me?

What is in me is acceptance, he said, and turned to face her. I cannot change who my parents are; I reconciled myself with that after the Burning Plains. What is is, and no amount of gnashing teeth on my part will change that. I am... gland, I think, to consider Brom my father. But I'm not sure ... It's all too much to grasp all at once.

He is so deep that even his life mate can't ... bond mate can't feel what he feels. Except that he never feels any sort of emotion anyway. He's always numb and distant. He just watches the world go by without any sort of emotional input, so this not being able to feel anything doesn't have any impact. Mostly because it's nothing new. There has been no change from the status-quo.

Saphira then beams Brom's final message into Eragon's brain. Okay, that might not exactly be it, but I can't think of any other way to describe it. I mean what else would you call being able to perfectly recall, with sight, sound and smell a message someone gave to you like you were a video camera. I mean, I would find it much easier to believe that Brom spoke into a crystal or put the message in the ring than for Saphira to be turned into a webcam. The fact that Brom is basically Obi-Wan Kenobi doesn't help me any because I keep on thinking of the scene from A New Hope where Luke gets that message from Leia while cleaning out R2-D2.

"Help me Brom-Kenobi, you're my only hope..."

Actually, what we get is the Lion King.

Brom said, "Ever the sun traces its path from horizon to horizon, and ever the moon follows, and ever the days roll past without care for the lives they grind away, one by one." Lowering his eyes, Brom gazed straight at Saphira and, through her, Eragon. "Try though they might, no being escapes death forever, not even the elves or the spirits. To all, there is an end. To every thing, turn, turn turn, there is a season, turn, turn turn.... If you are watching me, Eragon, then my end has come and I am dead and you know that I am your father."

Eragon: NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

Wait. No. Sorry. That was for Morzan.


No, wait, that requires emotional responses.

Eragon: Whatever.

Brom: Blah blah blah. I give you advice for you life. Blah. I wish I could have been there for you. Blah don't be stupid. too late. Blah blah let's retcon scramble up the magic system even more.

The way to defeat another magician is not by battering blindly against his mind. No! In order to ensure victory, you have to figure out how your enemy interprets information and reacts to the world. Then you will know his weaknesses, and there you strike. The trick isn't inventing a spell no one else has ever thought of before; the trick is finding a spell your enemy has over looked and using it against them. The trick isn't plowing your way through the barriers in someone's mind; the trick is slipping under or around the barriers.

Um. Okay then. I'm suddenly seeing the wizards going through a list of spells and throwing it at them at each other until something sticks. Who ever loses all their hit points first dies.

Another interesting thing. Brom says to Eragon, "May the stars watch over you..." Which makes no sense.

Why would the stars watch over you if the stars are just great big balls of gas. If they have no importance, no spirit or being alive. What good is having stars watching over you? And where the hell did that come from in the first place? Paolini's throwing religious things into Brisingr right and left with no real foundation. I wouldn't have a problem with the phrase if B. Brom had used it before and B.if there had been some sort of indication SOMEWHERE in the previous two and most of this third book about the stars having some sort of cultural significance to humans, elves or dragons or dragonriders or ANYTHING. He's blessing Eragon but without anything behind it. It'd be like if I were to say, "may the trashcan watch over you".

Of course the stars are going to watch over him! They're stars. They're in the sky! They... look down... and stuff.

May my cat watch over you makes much more sense. (If only because that's what he's likely doing.)

Why do Jedi say, "may the Force be with you"? because they believe that the Force is the all of life and is in everything. As long as it's there you're alive. Which is sort of what I think Paolini was going for.

But failed.

Annnnnny way, Saphira says that he is lucky to have gotten to spend time with Brom like that. All she has of her parents are a few 'hazy memories' from Gladear.

Which makes no sense. How come she can perfectly recall Brom's message, but Gladear can't recall her parents?


Oromis shows up and has soup.

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